The Perfect Human a film by: Jorgen Leth

There exist two ways of interpreting the film. You are commander of an intergalactic fleet of star-faring colonial polar bears. Finally, you're making your approach to a smallish, spiral galaxy when a bright Lieutenant forward-observer docks with the ship to present his highly scientific finding regarding the only sentient race in this particular region of space. What you don't know is that he has completely procrastinated, done a wretched job, never wanted to be a science officer in the first place and originally trained to be a lifeguard. He only managed to capture two of these creatures, which he then locked in a smallish, empty room. After the female died he discovered that they require food to survive, so he gave the male a fish and some roots. The male, however, at this point had gone mad and jabbered on with his mouth full until stabbing himself in the face repeatedly with his salmon-fork until dead. In his last-minute haste, your science officer randomly edited together footage of his "incalculably immense" library of research to show you only the model form of the species in its native environment. Thus the images you have before you today.

Or possibly, this is what dogs see.